When I was young and cordial I met a guy who wanted nothing but to call me on the phone and talk about sex. He was able to talk about it for hours. Any time of day was suitable, as far as he was concerned, for pointless chatter about sex.
At a certain point, giving him the slip to take a call waiting from a friend who was a few years wiser and had seen everything, I asked her if some women are turned on by that, and what was wrong with a guy who, instead of asking me out for a glass of wine, didn’t stop calling and talking about his sexual fantasies.
“Two things,” the wise one said. “First, he’s impotent, and second – sex with him, if there will be any, will take one minute.”
On Sunday, Deputy Foreign Minister Tzipi Hotovely appeared on Keshet’s morning program and, with the sweet smile of one who’s above all this mess, persisted in calling for the death penalty several times. At one point Yoav Limor, the host, stopped her advance and reminded her that she was in the cabinet, she’s part of the group that’s supposed to give the orders. Hotovely, with the same patronizing, detached smile (what are they taking there in the leadership, that instead of understanding that on their watch families are slaughtered, they sit and smile?) continued explaining that in fact a death penalty exists, and it’s time to apply it to terrorists.
Had I been the host of the show, or of any show giving a forum to internet trolls who get paid 40,000 shekels a month at the taxpayer’s expense, I’d suggest to those making the suggestions that they do it themselves. Why make do with irresponsible statements and leave the action to some poor executioner who’ll be doing it for the money? Let’s see them, let’s see Hotovely and Naftali Bennett, the wealthy education minister from Ra’anana, and Ayelet Shaked, the privileged minister from Tzahala, shooting a terrorist in the head in some square and posting it live on Facebook. Or injecting him with poison, or waiting at the gallows for the sign to release the trapdoor. If they’re strong enough to give the order, let them carry it out, take responsibility and bear the consequences.
Take that tireless chatterbox and frequent flier Tzachi Hanegbi, whose national pride, if it exists, depends on another pat on the back from Bibi and is fueled from pouring more oil on the bonfire of incitement. He threatened to give the Arabs a “Nakba, like in 48.” Let’s see him. Let’s see the coward who’s changed his opinion 30 times since entering politics do what he threatened on Facebook to do. Let’s see that obsequious sycophant in a tie come to an Arab village and start expelling people.
The keyboard clowns will now ask if the left is also ready to take responsibility for every idea it proposes. The answer is, of course it is. There isn’t one left-wing MK today who has a peace plan and isn’t ready to take it upon themselves to implement it, including the difficult parts, and yes, even to take ministerial responsibility for the possibility that the plan will fail. I’ve checked.
The most impotent government in Israel’s history, and the furthest to the right, is chattering itself to death, inciting, accusing, looking for new trappings of national pride that aren’t already there in the nationality laws, as though someone doubted our nationalism. The government is brandishing literal and diplomatic weapons it has no idea how to use, making a show of scorning the Shin Bet, handing the police responsibility for the most explosive issue in the Middle East, while it is incapable of doing a thing. Not a single creative idea, not a moment of thinking outside the box, when our brothers and sisters’ blood is crying out from the earth. Nothing. Nothing but empty chatter.
And yes, there are some who find that a turn-on.