Obama Nobel Prize / Peacemaker
Just look at that schlimazel, who won the most coveted prize. He's been president for ten months - ten whole months! - and still hasn't made peace, here or anywhere else. A real loser. And of all the peace people in the world - a wide and varied array - they chose him. What a scandal, what a joke.
Norway is funny, so they laugh. The world laughs, the region laughs and Israel is literally rolling with laughter, because here we have the world's largest concentration of experts in peacemaking; they've been making peace for decades upon decades. It's probably even more accurate to say they've been pursuing peace, constantly, vigorously, only it has always eluded them; it's peace's fault, not theirs.
Here and there some satisfaction could be seen. Sarkozy, Merkel, Berlusconi, Ban Ki Moon and Desmond Tutu were congratulatory; here and there some politeness was observed, with Tehran and Jerusalem paying lip service; but Hamas, the Taliban, the Islamic Jihad all strongly protest and the herds of bloggers are stamping their hooves, kicking and trampling this terrifying, astonishing win.
What did he do, after all?
He did not freeze a single settlement, clamor those who oppose the freeze - he talks and talks, and he talks too beautifully, so it seems he must be watched.
A man of tomorrow
It must be admitted that Obama is an odd duck: Among all the people of yesterday he seems to be a man of tomorrow; among all the Bushes and Cheneys, the Netanyahus and Baraks and Liebermans, he offers hope instead of despair; among all the warmongers, he speaks of peace; among all those who avert their eyes, he gazes head-on; among all the lunatics he is the only sane one.
Since when are awards given out for these kinds of things?
"What did he do?" they shout, as if they really want him to do anything; "What did he achieve?" they cry, as if they really want him to achieve.
By their standards, even the prophets would not be worthy of receiving a Nobel Prize - they only talked and talked, after all, and spoke from a fevered brain and a seething heart.
We are lucky that Norwegians, too, love the Old Testament, and perhaps by now they actually understand it better than we do.
Because apparently even God himself is not worthy of the Nobel prize - He only "makes peace in His heights," and as far as making "peace upon us and on all of Israel" is concerned - it appears in the future tense, a promise only.