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Eating Well / 42. On the virtues of patience
By Rachel Talshir

In many cases the transition to proper eating is accompanied by the necessity of forging coexistence with the rest of the family, who continue to consume junk food avidly. The seven rules that follow - which are recommended for this daily encounter between advocates of healthfulness and their immediate surroundings - can be summed up in one word: patience.

The first rule is to decide that my choice to eat healthfully is important to me, and therefore, irrespective of partners, opponents or supporters, I will go through with it. It's worthwhile, of course, to share the reasons and goals with the opposition camp, but initially there is no point either in asking for permission or trying to persuade the others.

The second rule is to try to tempt the others to join in, by means of consuming healthful foods that they already like. For us the agent of change was a thinly sliced salad made of a variety of select vegetables. I bought and washed the items, someone volunteered to do the slicing - and everyone enjoyed it and asked for more. The well-prepared salad, served in a giant bowl, came to occupy a central and honorable place at every family meal: for me with lemon and olive oil, along with white cheese or tahini, supplemented by whole-wheat bread; for them, seasoned with olive oil, salt and pepper. Accompanying a serving of meat in a pita, frequently with the addition of Parmesan cheese, our salad became a trademark of joint means, and if it doesn't appear eyebrows are raised.

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The third rule is to avoid confrontations. At first the food products I bought for myself drew howls of derision. Gradually, though, they became regular items in the family's menu. And not only the tahini and the sprouts - also the quinoa, the nuts and the seeds. Mockery, it's worth bearing in mind, is often only a defense mechanism that is vented against unfamiliar things.

The fourth rule: Strive for balance. Five years ago my family was not enthusiastic, to put it mildly, about my Shabbat-morning trip to the Amnons' farm (in Moshav Netaim, on the way to Kibbutz Palmahim) to buy fruits and vegetables and other produce. We endured a whole series of experiences and gradually all adopted a more moderate approach. Sometimes they even remind me: It's time to head for the Amnons' place. I don't always feel like making the trip. There are occasions when I would just as soon pass up the drive and the shopping, but they miss the taste of the fresh eggs, the freshly picked lettuce, the superb watermelons.

The fifth rule: Enlist everyone in the preparation process. People who learn how to prepare their own food prefer their salad and their dressing. Children, too, after a few days away from home, already miss their salad made of the vegetables that await them at home with their favorite dressing (top-grade olive oil, molasses, mustard seeds and lemon).

The seventh rule is to invest heavily in cooking. This rewards everyone. Above all because cooking, like many other activities, is thus transformed from being a technical burden into a source of pleasure when one goes about it diligently and mindfully. And also because it's unreasonable that anyone will prefer to eat in fast-food chains when fresh, tasty and healthful food awaits at home.

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