Family Affair / The Agbaria-Kahwashes By Avner Avrahami and Reli Avrahami Umm al-Fahm The cast: Wissam (36), Hiba (31), Shahed (3.5), Amru (1.5) Agbaria: The name of the extended family; Kahwash is the name of the immediate family. Advertisement The house: Located on a hill at the entrance to the city, in a three-story family compound overlooking the Wadi Ara highway. Wissam and Hiba live upstairs, his parents live on the middle floor and they rent out the ground floor. The house is spacious, has many balconies and is painted pink; it can be seen from a distance. Wissam says that with the outbreak of the October 2000 riots the top floor was occupied by soldiers and the family was ordered to remain together on the lower floors. We go out to the balcony to see the view. The junction, Highway 65, the Al-Babour restaurant, the gas station, the houses of the city, the mosques - everything is spread out before us, dozing in the winter sun. Wissam: "They called me to testify in the Or Commission" (which investigated the killing of the 13 Arab civilians in the 2000 riots). The interior design: The spacious house (390 square meters) includes two levels with matte tiling and a star-shaped ceiling, from which natural light streams in (not that there is a shortage of windows). The entry level has three living rooms. One is furnished with gray fabric sofas, the second with blue leather sofas and the third is still in the planning stage. Later we will sit in the first living room. For now we'll wander around. Wandering: A cherry-wood kitchen ("We did a barter deal with the carpenter"), a dining area with a heavy table ("That's from Hiba's dowry") and a workroom under construction complete the entry level. We go up to the top floor. The top floor: The floor consists of two bedrooms, one for the parents (with a double bed and a baby bed), one for the children - at the moment Shahed's (with a youth bed, a colorful rug, dolls and a large clothes closet) - an office (with a computer), a family room (television) and a bathroom. Lots of room. We go downstairs. On the surfaces of the white walls is a picture of women grinding flour, a bas relief of the Dome of the Rock and a clock decorated with the 99 names of Allah. Real estate history: Wissam and Hiba's floor was added by the Agbaria-Kachwash family in 1996-1997. It was built with the money from the joint family coffers. They say it's hard to calculate how much it cost. In any case, they have no mortgage. The refreshments arrive. The refreshments. Along with Prigat juice (orange) and black coffee (in demitasse cups), Hiba serves ma'amoul (filled date cookies) and apple cake. Livelihoods and occupations: Hiba is completing her law studies (fourth year) at Ramat Gan College; she is studying three times a week this year, on the other days she stays home and fulfills the roles of mother and housewife ("I don't have a maid"). She gets to school with bus No. 538 (Tiberias-Tel Aviv), or in a passing cab. She plans to become involved in "family law" or "medical malpractice." She hasn't decided yet. She says that there is a large increase in the number of divorce cases in Umm al-Fahm. Wissam's livelihood: An attorney, with his own firm in the city together with a partner ("We're looking for a third one"), he appears in military courts (for example, at the Salem checkpoint), specializes in defending minors, and is dealing with about 90 cases, including one of a boy with an explosives belt who was caught at the Hawara checkpoint in 2004. He receives his salary directly from a European Union budget; his work hours are "insane" ("from morning until 7-8 P.M."). He says that his clients are usually people who have been exploited emotionally, financially or ideologically; he does not ask whether "they did it" ("I avoid superfluous information"), and usually does not arrive at an acquittal, but "a reduced-punishment arrangement" is enough for him. He drives on the West Bank roads in a 2000 Mercedes 280-E, secondhand, is in contact with many parents, doesn't enter Nablus ("because of the army"), and is not afraid of ambushes. "They (the Palestinians) start with the assumption that anyone who comes with a yellow license place is definitely not a Jew." Concern: "When I can't get him on the cell phone, I worry a lot" (Hiba). And the children: Shahed and Amru are in the same nursery school in Umm al-Fahm (10 minutes from the house). Shahed is in preschool and Amru is in nursery school, they pay a subsidized tuition ("NIS 350 per child, including meals"). Wissam brings them in the morning, parents, brothers, sisters pick them up in the afternoon (at about 2:30 P.M.). Wissam's bio: Born in 1970, Umm al-Fahm, scion of a well-to-do family. His father, now retired, was the owner of a sewing factory; his mother, who helped with the paperwork, is now a housewife. He studied in an elementary school in Umm al-Fahm, attended the Orthodox high school in Haifa, did his matriculation in the sciences, helped in the sewing factory ("I was a jack-of-all-trades") and went to study. Studies: He went to study law in Prague, returned after half a year (because of the 1989 revolution), went to Jerusalem, began to study economics and sociology at the Hebrew University, organized several demonstrations ("I was not considered militant"), in 1994 returned home, tried to join the family business ("It was hard in textiles because of the competition with China"), went to work at Mizrahi Bank ("I was in their administrative program") and at the same time went to study law at the Netanya Academic College. He graduated in 2000; since then he's been working in the profession. Hiba's bio: Born in Kafr Kara in 1975; her father, retired, was the assistant principal of an elementary school and her mother, once a kindergarten teacher, is now the owner of Bonbon, a store for children's clothing in the village. She did 5-unit honors matriculation in mathematics, biology and chemistry, was accepted to study economics and business administration at the University of Haifa, and went to study medicine in Liege, Belgium, where she had relatives. She began with dentistry, went over to medical sciences and considered a career in the field until in mid-1998 Wissam showed up and changed her plans. The meeting: In the summer of 1997, he saw her at his sister's wedding ("her mother is actually my cousin") and said to himself: "Walla, maybe she's the one." Liege: Before he traveled to meet her, he made sure to get a green light from her family. They suggested that he wait until the summer, but he decided to leave immediately. It was winter; she waited for him at the train station, he was freezing and she took him to her rented room ("Our parents trusted us"), where he proposed to her. She said that she had to think about it; they went on a trip to Holland. When he returned to Israel, he knew she had already decided. He called her every day, until she clearly said: "I do." In the summer, in her parents' house, he gave her a diamond ring. The wedding: Three years later (2001), the Meis al-Rim Gardens in Arara (in the Galilee Triangle), over 1,000 guests, with a band from Tarshiha. The event was preceded by a bachelors' party and two henna ceremonies - one in the bride's home, the other in the groom's home. She bought the dress from designer Galia Lahav ("I went to Tel Aviv some 20 times for it"), and her hair was done by Suzy of Salon Suzy, who came to Kafr Kara especially from Haifa. After the wedding they spent two days at the Dan Accadia and 10 days on the island of Kos ("It was fun"). Their first rented home was on Moriah Boulevard in Haifa. Hiba was studying in the Technion - Israel Institute of Technology at the time ("still medical sciences"); Wissam was working in Nazareth, where he had an office. In 2003, they landed in Umm al-Fahm. Umm al-Fahm: There were two reasons for the decision to move: convenience and obligation. Convenience - because of the first pregnancy; obligation - Wissam could not refuse his parents who wanted someone to live near them ("After all, Dad invested everything in our education"). New fatherhood: "The burden is on Hiba," admits Wissam. Although he was present at both births (in Rothschild Hospital in Haifa), he has never changed diapers. Daily schedule: Hiba gets up at 5:30 A.M., because of Amru. She gives him a dairy snack, drinks tea (Earl Grey with spearmint leaves from the yard) and takes time for some make-up - rouge and eyeliner ("five minutes"). Wissam, who had been called to Shahed's room at night and stayed there to sleep, continues sleeping until 7 A.M. At about 8, after Shahed's cornflakes, Wissam takes the kids to school. He'll drink his first cup of coffee in the office. At noon, if Hiba is at home, he'll drop in for maklouba (a dish made with meat and potatoes) or spaghetti. If not, he'll return in the evening. When Hiba returns from school the children are already at home; she'll keep them occupied until the evening, give them something to eat ("something small"), shower them and put them to bed (by 8 P.M.). Television: Wissam - only sports (Maccabi Haifa); Hiba - anything but sports (she likes "London and Kirschenbaum"). Both agree on "Hayom shehaya" ("The Day That Was"). Dreams: Wissam - three children, a villa in Caesarea and "enough money to devote my life to volunteer work"; Hiba - an independent law firm. Belief: They are both secular. Wissam believes in reward and punishment; Hiba says that one can do good things without being religious. Quarrels and reconciliation: "There are the usual incidents" (Wissam). Hiba says that she initiates the sulhas (reconciliations). Peace: "In the end they [the Israelis] will agree on the 1967 borders" (Wissam). The Iranian threat: Wissam is not afraid. He says that it's all a matter of a balance of powers: "Those who should be afraid are the countries that don't have [a balance] - Egypt and Saudi Arabia." Second-class citizens: "At the airport" (Hiba); "When entering and leaving the territories" (Wissam). He understands the situation: "Why does a reserve soldier my age at the checkpoint, in the cold, harass me? Because of the Mercedes. But I need it for my work." Sayed Kashua: They both read him. "I like him," says Wissam. "But do you think that he puts any effort into what he does?" Happiness (on a scale of 1 to 10): 8+, both of them.

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1.	only if everyoen was like this	04:59	|	jon purizhansky	30/12/06
2.	how sweet it is	07:31	|	sho	30/12/06
3.	And they lived happily ever after	11:25	|	James McNamara	30/12/06
4.	Not bad for "discriminated" Israeli-Arabs	18:04	|	Mark	30/12/06
5.	white picket fence	23:47	|	Shosh	30/12/06
6.	#4 & #1 - Why do you have to be mean?	02:06	|	Edan	31/12/06
7.	Best Wishes	09:12	|	Shelley	31/12/06