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Family Affair / The Coorsh-Rochels By Avner and Reli Avrahami Moshav Merhavia Advertisement W The cast: Rony (54), Lilach (39), Clara (75), Naomi (22), Roderigo (16), Nimrod (13), Noga (9.5), Romy (9), Avigail (4), Ayelet (2). W Who's who: Rony (Chapter 4) and Lilach (Chapter 2) are the parents of Avigail and Ayelet. Rony brought Naomi (from Chapter 1), Roderigo (from Chapter 2) and Noga (from Chapter 3); Lilach brought Nimrod and Romy (from Chapter 1). Clara, Rony's mother, lives nearby on the family's property. W The family plot: 120 dunams (30 acres), of which 5 dunams are next to the house and the rest in two distant sites, which are leased to farmers. W Besides which: Lilach is pregnant and due in February (it will be a home birth). The gender of the new addition is unknown ("We made an effort not to know"). W Other residents: Horses named Jasmine and Ziko ("for Ziko Graziani," the longtime conductor of the IDF Orchestra); dogs named Jackie, Ginger and Hotem; goats named Isabella and Esmeralda; plus 11 cats, two hamsters and a few geese, ducks, chickens and roosters. W Additional buildings: Besides Clara's house, the yard contains Naomi's mobile home, Rony's workshop and studio, a barn, a chicken coop and a field strewn with stones which in the future will become headstones. W The home: Shaded, faded roof tiles, built in 1937 by Daniel and Leah Coorsh, Rony's grandparents, renovated once; roof continues to struggle against leaks. We enter through a screen door. W Entering: The house is full of objects (including hanging hammocks for sitting), but has no living room. In its center is a large dining table ("made by Orit, the carpenter"), which is also used when company calls. Adjacent is a comfy corner with a Russian-made piano and a bureau crammed with books (Oz, Grossman, Szymborska alongside art books). Further on are 2 1/2 bedrooms. W Bedrooms: Nimrod and Romy share a room, which also hosts Noga (when she visits from Binyamina). The parents sleep in another room on a wide mattress together with Avigail and Ayelet. Roderigo has a small room of his own, which contains a collection of windsurfing medals. There is a television set in the parents' room that doesn't work, but functions effectively as a frame for a painting by Rony. W Livelihoods and occupations: Rony designs headstones and is also a painter and sculptor. He works in stone, bronze, glass and steel, and his clients generally find him through the Internet ("Google Rony Coorsh"). He meets with the bereaved families in the backyard studio, and after finding out about the deceased, prepares an "artistic headstone" within two or three weeks with the help of two employees (from the villages of Sajur and Sulam). His fee ranges from NIS 8,000 to NIS 20,000. One famous headstone he did was for the legendary singer Shoshana Damari ("with an anemone made of red glass" to evoke her signature song). He loves his work and after 17 years in the profession continues to be thrilled by it, and meets "amazing people after their death." In some cases he remains friends with the surviving relatives ("with Lilach, for example"). He pays frequent visits to cemeteries throughout the country ("from Metula to Eilat"). W The next world: "Less heaven-hell, more reincarnations." W Painting-sculpting: Mainly on Shabbat, though here and there he steals an hour or two in the evening. He paints in acrylic on canvas and so far has sold three works. W Lilach's occupations: Mother, breast-feeding counselor and doula, she prepares women to give birth and is a "general adviser to life-challenged parents." She used to play the flute and also worked as a high-tech developer ("I dove into the mire of gushing motherhood"). Her "consulting" includes "pelvic floor" and women and infants' workshops. She also has a Web site, gives massages to pregnant women (in Naomi's trailer) and makes house calls (NIS 250-350). W Home birthing: Recommended. "Eighty-five percent of the births are not at risk." All the rest, she says, go to hospital. W Others' occupations: Clara, a retired teacher, now paints, cooks, embroiders and volunteers. Naomi is getting ready to start midwife studies, having already worked in Mexico as an "apprentice home midwife." Roderigo, who is in 10th grade in a school on Kibbutz Mizra, came to Israel a year and a half ago to live with his father, Rony. Nimrod, an eighth-grade student in the same school, plays the piano, plays tennis and creates video clips. Noga, who lives in Binyamina with her mother Tali, is in third grade, likes hamsters and is in a jazz dancing group. Romy, who is in fourth grade in a school on Kibbutz Merhavia, plays the violin and does karate. Avigail is at home and in the yard, usually naked, and like her sister Ayelet is also still breast-feeding. W Rony's bio: Born 1954, Moshav Merhavia, grandson of founders. His father, Uri, grew vegetables and flowers, bred cows and was a beekeeper. Rony was thrown out of high school in Afula in 11th grade ("I drew a cartoon of the deputy principal"). His father then invited him to work with him in farming ("I accepted the invitation"). Afterward he studied as part of an external high-school program in Tel Aviv ("I stayed with Aunt Hanna") to obtain his matriculation certificate. Drafted in 1972 into the army, he served as a pilot on Dakota and Hercules aircraft. After his discharge he went to New York, opened a falafel stand, worked in an Israeli-run moving company, then went to Brazil, bought a boat and worked two years as a fisherman in Bahia. After returning to Israel he married Miraleh ("We met in the army") and went with her to Brazil (where Naomi was born), making a living as a jewelry designer. In 1987 Miraleh went off to California and Rony raised Naomi by himself, returning to Israel with her in 1990 ("I took her with me to reserve duty and got an exemption"). After nursing his father until his death ("He was a special person"), he decided not to lay a regular headstone on his grave ("I used a natural basalt boulder from the fields of the [Jezreel] Valley and a bronze vine"). He has been in headstones ever since. After the mourning period he flew to Brazil, and after returning to Israel (a year later) was informed that he was the father of a boy (Roderigo), whose mother had worked for him as a nanny ("It was an encounter of longing, of body and soul"). He acknowledged his paternity immediately, met Tali (1993) and with her adopted Noga (in Romania), before parting with her in 2000. Tali moved to Binyamina (with Noga) and Rony stayed on the kibbutz, ostensibly alone but actually with H. (an Arab woman from Ramle), who helped him overcome his loneliness. He met Lilach in 2003. W Lilach's bio: Born in Binyamina in 1968, took the name Rochel from her husband; describes her father as a "laborer, work foreman and intellectual"; her mother did "artistic knitting" and was a part-time policewoman. Attended elementary school in Herzliya and Ramat Efal, high school in Rehovot and on Kibbutz Kabri in the Galilee (after the family moved to Kfar Vradim). After doing army service as a psychometric examiner, she attended the Rubin Academy of Music in Jerusalem, met her future husband, obtained a master's degree in music in Maryland, was "first flute" with the Israel Sinfonietta Be'er Sheva, entered high-tech after vocational retraining, and worked five years for Nice Systems. However, after Romy's birth ("which was supposedly natural"), she felt that her place was in "the struggle to restore women's autonomy over their body." Around this time she was divorced ("relations with my ex are improving") and her mother died, in the wake of which she met Rony and experienced a "welcome jump-start in my life." W The meeting: 2003. Lilach, a high-tech divorcee with two children, was living in Kfar Sava. In April her father arranged a meeting with a maker of headstones from Merhavia. When she saw him in the field of boulders in his red undershirt, she knew he would be the father of her children, she relates ("and when he told me he was a pilot, I knew he liked me, too"). By chance she had two tickets to the opening event of the Israel Festival in Jerusalem. Mustering her courage, she called and invited him to accompany her. He arrived at the Nice underground parking area in Ra'anana from Merhavia, and she drove him up to ground level from six floors below at such a speed that he was pinned to the seat ("I'd practiced the move for five years"). He was impressed and they have been together ever since. "We cover the whole spectrum of life," she says. "I deal with births and he deals with deaths." There was no wedding. W Household chores: Rony is "compartmentalized": "We have struck a balance," Lilach says. She has no complaints. Three times a week, Iris ("an angel") comes from Afula to help out. Lilach makes lunch herself (for three to eight diners) - "always quality organic food, but not fanatic." They don't watch television; instead, they read and play backgammon. Roderigo has also adjusted. W Bathing: Lilach fills the bath and all the children (apart from Roderigo) wash by themselves ("Avigail and Ayelet wash each other's hair") without changing the water. The last user is Rony. Lilach prefers to shower. W Dreams: "To make a living from painting" (Rony); "I am living the dream" (Lilach). W God: They do not believe. Lilach did not pray to God during her four births ("I told the kid: Come on, come on!"). W Medicines: In principle, no vaccinations ("other than for tetanus"). W Next birth: At home. Lilach will give birth in a plastic pool that will be placed where the dining table now stands, and will be assisted by a midwife from Ramat Hasharon. W Political orientation: "Overall we are left wing," says Roni (Meretz). Lilach objects: "We are sane humanists" (Meretz). W Happiness quotient (scale of 1-10): Noga - 10; Lilach - 9.5; Naomi, Romy and Roderigo - 9, Nimrod - 8.5; Rony - 8. The place Moshav Merhavia - A cooperative agricultural community located close to Afula, it is adjacent to Kibbutz Merhavia and was the first Jewish settlement in the Jezreel Valley, in 1910; a moshav since 1922. Bookmark to del.icio.us   Humanitarian initiative There is a way for Israel to prove it is committed to universal moral values. Top Targets An Islamist site is compiling a list of U.K. Jews to target over Gaza op.

Read & React Yossi Melman: Excellent intel on Gaza shows Israel learned from Lebanon errors Responses: 9 Barak Ravid: Gaza op has ended Israel's honeymoon with Turkey Responses: 7 At least two Lebanon rockets hit north Israel; IDF responds with shells Responses: 22 Nasrallah: Hezbollah will make Lebanon war look like a walk in the park Responses: 18 Gideon Lichfield: So, why isn't Israel winning the PR war? Responses: 6 More Headlines 14:00 IDF officer killed during battle with Hamas militants in Gaza 13:13 At least two Lebanon rockets hit north Israel; IDF responds with shells 11:10 ANALYSIS / Rocket fire on North is realization of Iranian threat 13:59 4 people wounded when Gaza mortar shell strikes west Negev 10:23 Palestinian shot dead after trying to blow up settlement gas station 13:25 Hamas executes collaborators and restricts Fatah movement 07:29 ANALYSIS / Excellent intel on Gaza shows Israel learned from its errors in Lebanon 07:34 ANALYSIS / Israel's three alternatives for the future of the Gaza war 13:40 Mubarak invites Olmert to Cairo to discuss Gaza truce offer 18:20 Get up to the minute coverage of the warfare in Gaza directly to your email 13:48 Red Cross: Israel breaking law, letting children starve in Gaza 03:17 Iran's Larijani meets Hamas political chief Meshal in Damascus 13:17 IDF sources: Conditions not yet optimal for Gaza exit 06:22 ANALYSIS / Gaza op has put an end to Israel's honeymoon with Turkey 22:58 Rice: Gaza truce needed, but must not allow return to 'status quo ante' 05:00 48-hours after her wedding, IDF officer enters Gaza with her troops 21:27 Obama vows to 'engage immediately' on Mideast once inaugurated 05:51 Lindenstrauss blasts slow handling of evacuated Gaza settlers' plight 06:14 Tel Aviv judge defends right of Arab anti-war protesters 07:21 Israeli tennis star Shahar Peer faces Gaza protest while playing in New Zealand 01:51 German court rules Nazi hit man unfit to stand trial 06:44 El Al asks frequent flyers to donate points to lone soldiers 20:40 In battle for public opinion, IDF Web site puts female face forward Previous Editions Select Day 07 jan 06 jan 05 jan 04 jan 02 jan 01 jan 31 dec 30 dec 29 dec 28 dec 26 dec 25 dec

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